Intimate Partner Violence 101
WHAT IS INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE?
Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) – A pattern of coercive behavior used by adults or adolescents to control their partners involving physical assault or the threat of it.
Intimate Partner Violence can take different forms, but its goal is always the same:
Batterers want to control their domestic partners through fear. They do this by regularly abusing them physically, sexually, psychologically and economically.
Here are some of the forms intimate partner violence can take:
PHYSICAL ABUSE
Hitting * Slapping * Kicking * Choking * Pushing * Punching * Beating.
VERBAL ABUSE
Constant criticism * Making humiliating remarks * Not responding to what the victim is saying * Mocking * Name-calling * Yelling * Swearing * Interrupting * Changing the subject.
SEXUAL VIOLENCE
Forcing sex on an unwilling partner * Demanding sexual acts that the victim does not want to perform * Degrading treatment
ISOLATION
Making it hard for the victim to see friends and relatives * Monitoring phone calls * Reading mail * Controlling where the victim goes * Taking the victim’s car keys.
COERCION
Making the victim feel guilty * Pushing the victim into decisions * Sulking * Manipulating children and other family members * Always insisting on being right * Making up impossible “rules” and punishing the victim for breaking the.
HARASSMENT
Following or stalking * Embarrassing the victim in public * Constantly checking up on the victim * Refusing to leave when asked.
ECONOMIC CONTROL
Not paying bills * Refusing to give the victim money * Not letting the victim work * Interfering with the victim’s job * Refusing to work and support the family.
ABUSING TRUST
Lying * Breaking promises * Withholding important information * Being unfaithful * Being overly jealous * Not sharing domestic responsibilities.
THREATS and INTIMIDATION
Threatening to harm the victim, the children, family members and pets * Using physical size to intimidate * Shouting * Keeping weapons and threatening to use them.
EMOTIONAL WITHHOLDING
Not expressing feelings * Not giving compliments * Not paying attention * Not respecting the victim’s feelings, rights and opinions * Not taking the victim’s concerns seriously.
DESTRUCTION OF PROPERTY
Destroying furniture * Punching walls * Throwing things * Breaking dishes.
SELF DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR
Abusing drugs or alcohol * Threatening self-harm or suicide*
Driving recklessly * Deliberately doing things that will cause trouble (like telling off the boss).
INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE RESULTS IN:
· Physical Harm – It is the most common cause of injuries for which women seek help at emergency rooms and the most common cause of the murder of women in the United Sates today.
· Emotional Harm to Victim and Children – Battering often causes Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder in survivors and is given as a top cause of suicide, depression, and addictions in women. For children, witnessing their mother/father being beaten causes as many and as serious symptoms as being beaten themselves
