Intimate partner Violence is CHILD ABUSE!
What Happens to Children in Violent Homes? Will They Repeat the Cycle? How Does Intimate Partner Violence Effect Children?
Children develop their own strategies for survival while growing up in abusive homes, including:
Avoiding conflict by being a “perfect child.” Children often view themselves as the cause of the anger and violence. They may feel guilty and believe that the violence will not occur if they are well behaved.
Trying to diffuse family tension to avoid violence. Children may attempt to manipulate their parents’ behaviors, feelings or actions to stop the violence. They may draw attention to themselves or refocus the abuser’s attention.
Trying to intervene during violent outbursts on their mother’s behalf. Children frequently try to protect their mother from the violence.
Becoming passive and withdrawn. When children learn that they cannot control the violence in their families, they may withdraw to protect themselves. They are often frightened to see the people who they love the most being abusive and being hurt.
Learning to use violence to control others. Children from violent homes often bully their friends, siblings or mothers. They learn that violence is an effective means of gaining control over others.
Acting out in destructive ways. Children may act out through alcohol or drug abuse, delinquent behavior, school related problems, criminal behavior, depression or suicide.
Stopping the Cycle of Violence
Unfortunately, children learn what they experience at home. Children DO know about violence in their home, despite the attempts by the parents to hide what is going on. Boys and girls who grow up in violent homes are more likely to carry these behaviors into their own relationships, either as an abusive man or as an abused woman.
The one way to STOP THIS CYCLE is to teach our children that violence is not an acceptable method of dealing with difficulties. Our counseling center has therapy designed to help children recover from intimate partner violence.